This Drifting Excrement Was Way Too Meaningful! It's the Television Letdowns of the Year.

As we consider the television landscape of the past year, a selection of shows stand out not for their excellence, but for their spectacular failures. Ranging from awkward spin-offs to bafflingly bad documentaries, here are the programmes that left us utterly bewildered or simply reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this divisive spin-off? Burdened with dreadful scripts, painful arcs (justice for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the show struggled to find its footing. For a moment, as the final season began, it seemed as if it had finally hit its stride. Then arrived an installment all about Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the showrunner announced this would be the last season. It concluded on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s toilet full of poo was simply too on-the-nose. Still, fans undeniably had a hoot picking apart every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – danced around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a little sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was almost the smallest of this drama's problems. The recipient of a very rare zero star assessment, it was difficult to know where to start enumerating the problems. The hilariously leaden writing? The mind-numbing veneration of affluence and materialism? The almost wilful parade of cliches? Acting so bad they felt borderline spiteful? Let’s just say “all of the above” and never speak of this series again. Except, a new season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Considering the restraining orders, abuse allegations and fatherly failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not that you’d really have gleaned it from this multi-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various episodes of reckless excess while struggling to tell us anything we weren't already aware of. Rather, it felt as if this volatile personality was being indulged, so any sympathy this series might induce should be reserved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charming but flippant narcissist.

The Iris Affair

Naturally we understood it was ridiculous from the outset: a drama about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or destroy all of humanity. We stuck with it out of sheer love for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ended up slicing Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. That's what you call admitting defeat.

The Gangster Drama

Shady characters convening in deserted boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its crime drama back.

Actually, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many seem a bit dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the embarrassment of having to indulge baffling dialects. But there were plenty of other issues. Primarily that it was just really dull; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various cockney picaresques which seemed rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the extent to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s ostentatiously enraged commentators, it’s temptingly easy to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into quaint lifestyle as intentional provocations. But then you view them and are forced to concede that in this case, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine animated; a poster for evening drinks with ideas of grandeur; a parade of snoozing dogs, humming beehives, Hallmark sayings and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll forget instantly. All supported by immense, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are clearly interesting things to be said about regarding Victoria Beckham and her struggles with vocation, identity, self-acceptance. But for some reason, this three-part series opted not to explore them. Rather, the viewing was like consuming a sales catalogue. She obviously has good reason to bridle at what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any helps with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Game Show

It should have been the next big hit – except even more extravagant, with a famous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you want? As players competed, there was plenty of betrayal and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s even now too complicated to explain what precisely was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up smelling of a production that was straining desperately to emulate something far greater than it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How does one succeed a show that captured a generation? The pressure was enormous for this glitzy romcom about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who arrives in London with a broken heart. The lead actress took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very slick and, paradoxically, was not enough. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity friends involved felt icky.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd inclusion of talented emerging comics, hopes were high. But unhappily, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a single joke stretched to a husk but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the idea that they should probably have stayed in there a bit longer.

The Knox Dramatisation

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively showcased the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an compelling drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The material needed to be handled with care. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right voice, lurching from oddly breezy, slightly mannered farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Complex? Arguably. A total mess? Absolutely.

The Maths Genius Thriller

We admire the lead actor … but did we buy him playing the greatest maths genius in history, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a discovery that could ruin society? No! This international thriller about secret services targeting – and killing off – academics frankly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This uncritical portrait followed the content creator notorious for sexual exploits as she undertook her biggest feat yet. What on earth would possess her? What we wanted was way more examination of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have interviewed the now-famous mum who appeared to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific shots and absolutely no interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the filmmaker has a young daughter too.